Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Disappointment Part 2

         Disappointment is something we all have to deal with on a regular basis. And as you all know, everything is relative. When I was first injured, I felt as if no one, absolutely no one’s tiny little disappointments meant a thing compared to how miserable an existence I had to deal with. Of course, I see things a bit differently now. I can actually see outside my own head, I can feel empathy for someone else’s pain and suffering, I can hear the tension in another person’s voice and sometimes I can actually catch myself before I do or say something incredibly self defeating, self centered or just plain stupid or rude.
         Today I found a note from a fellow quadriplegic and blogger in my comments introducing herself and explaining how she found my blog. The name of her blog is “paralyzed with  joy “and she is paralyzed from the NECK down. As I looked for her blog I wondered to myself ”How can someone paralyzed from the neck down be joyful ?”Then I started to check out her blog, I read her profile which I thought was tragic, looked at the photos she had posted that showed a happy, upbeat and pretty young lady even in the hospital shots and read some of her blogs which like her photos reflected a happy, upbeat, well adjusted young woman and yet still possessed that somewhat worldliness beyond her tender late twenties just like every spinal cord injured person I’ve ever met. And I stopped for a moment…and said a small prayer…of thanks for the blessings I have and for my new friend that she may be blessed this day with something special.
         These are the things that make it possible for me to believe in God. I was writing a comment to another victim of SCI and this girl read my comment and visited my blog and left me the note. Truly not everything in the world is either a happy or tragic accident or coincidence. I don’t believe it is. To everything there is a season and a purpose under heaven.
         I do not feel disappointed today. I feel grateful, happy to have the opportunity to make a new friend, satisfied with the direction my life is going, thrilled to be so busy, comfortable and not in great pain and hopeful for better and better things in my life from the blessings of God, who keeps surprising me because I haven’t suddenly became a “Bible thumper” or anything. However, I certainly am grateful to feel His presence again.  


  1. What a touching post! I'm so glad that we found each other's blogs. I really think it's important to be able to read about other paralyzed people's lives to find out what sorts of things they've gone through, struggle with, etc. I hope you have a wonderful day!

    PS – I also wanted to tell you that I really relate to the dreams and hallucinations that you experienced a few times while in the hospital. I was hospitalized for 15 days in the fall of 2007, and I was delirious for much of the time. During that time I was plagued with horrible nightmares that I couldn't escape from. The dreams were part reality and part nightmare. I think my doctors called this "hospital psychosis" and it sounds like you experienced the same thing, or something very similar. I don't think the average person realizes how scary it is to be trapped in a nightmare where you aren't sure what's real!

  2. I believe things happen for a reason. In this post, you talked about how Heather found your blog through a comment you left on someone else's blog. Well, I found your blog through the comment you left on Heather's blog.

    Eight years ago I was in a car accident. I'm a C-1 C-2 quadriplegic paralyzed from the neck down and on a ventilator. I've messaged with Heather a few times and we've become friends. We have a lot in common and we both have similar outlooks on life. I'm a motivational speaker and currently Ms. wheelchair Minnesota. I strive to educate others about people with disabilities and share what having a positive attitude can do for your life. I also speak to new SCI's helping them through their journey.

    I read some of your story and find it very inspiring. It's to see that there are so many people helping others in similar situations. I hope we get a chance to talk sometime. Thanks!



please feel free to be as open, honest, blunt, and real as think you need to when leaving your comment. any of you who can relate to any one of my issues or takes offense to something I've written I'd especially like to hear from. I'm sorry to say that any comments left anonymously will not be published whether positive or negative. however, i still appreciate the insight and value the opinion. Thanks, L.A.M.B.